HOW TO WORK TOGETHER WITH A SPOUSE
I almost went off on my husband like the wife in the “What are you wearing Jake from State Farm” commercial. My husband’s offense was he put his cell phone on speaker. What I needed at that moment were a few work-together guidelines for me and my husband. We needed ground rules to learn how to work together. Or I could toss his phone into the street and wait for traffic patterns to disable the speaker feature.
HOW TO WORK TOGETHER
If you and your spouse work from home, was it a seamless transition with glitter and twinkly lights in the office? My husband was ecstatic about his new home office.
I wondered if there was such a thing as one being too happy.
Over the years, one of us grew accustomed to working remotely in her brownstone in the suburbs home.
As a Realtor, my hours and days are fluid. I may be at home for an entire day followed by a day of showings and attending a six-hour inspection. In March of 2020 that all changed. It was temporary I reminded myself. This would pass.
Ten days into the stay-at-home guidelines, my husband discovered he was way more productive in his home office.
I was afraid this would happen.
We were completely different in our work habits. And, our new workday routine looked nothing like a Hallmark movie.
It was headed to that chandelier scene in War of the Roses with Kathleen Turner and Michael Douglas.
My need for solitude and quiet can be traced back to my childhood with four siblings.
And, after years of being the only one working from home, my husband’s work habits and home office unleashed my inner control freak tendencies.
Over a few weeks,we settled on a healthy work environment. We learned to happily co-exist (most days). We (me) needed a few ground rules to work from home.
MALL CHANGES
- Separate spaces
We are fortunate to have a finished basement. We created (rearranged) a bonus room for my husband to have a designated home office.
2. Invest in a 2nd Printer
We both agreed that listening to a printer churn out pages disrupts one’s concentration.
2 . Lunch Breaks
I knew I was not the only one who struggled with my new co-worker over the lunch hour. One blogger lamented her husband asked her what’s for lunch every day.
3. Work Day Hours
I start my days early. I love quiet time and coffee. Somedays he has 15-hour days and other days he is done by noon.
4. Acknowledge Work Habits
Where I like to hunker down from 8:30 to 5 pm with a 15-minute lunch break, my husband likes to take breaks, pop his head into my office, and share the details of his morning at Panera. We acknowledged our differences and came to a mutual understanding.
5. Conference Calls
My husband is chatty. I am chatty with my sister and girlfriends. My husband is genuinely friendly and outgoing every.single.minute of the day. I am chatty after a productive morning or a gallon of coffee.
LOOKS LIKE WE MADE IT
Working from home is an adjustment. He loves working from home and I know it is more productive for him too.
We have settled into a routine that feels balanced. It turns out I will not need Jake from State Farm.
How do you handle a retired or working-from-home husband? Or what is a funny story you care to share for an updated post of the Marriage Diaries series?
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I have managed my husband’s business the past 40 years, I think for the most part we worked well together in the same office because we had a common goal. Retirement will be a whole different chapter we are getting ready to jump into.
My hubby has always worked from home and has his office in the basement but with two additional co-workers now also working from home, it’s been an adjustment for sure! I have to find quiet spots for myself because I definitely need my alone time and quiet for what I do!
I get it! Of course, nothing makes me smile more than hearing my youngest on phone or facetime with his friends and just laughing!
Love this post, Laura!! My husband works from home and we (meaning my husband) were not successful in following the established ground rules/boundaries…one of us had to leave and that one that me! Even through quarantine, my work is considered essential so I have continued to go to work Monday through Friday. Hope you are well and happy!
HI Janet, You get it! Stay healthy and thank you for stopping by! xo laura
Yes, your (first) husband is very chatty and loves to know everyone’s life story!
One BENEFIT of both of us being around was we could get the dogs out on a walk together, go our separate ways, and the dogs were tired while we worked.
Oh that’s a good reminder sissy! Thank you!
Great post, Laura. This pandemic thing leads to many lifestyle changes. My husband talks so loudly on the phone that I am sure our neighbors can here him. My family tells me that I become a lot more chatty after a half bottle of vino. Have a great weekend!
My kids tell me my voice gets louder after a 2nd glass! ha! Have a great weekend Katie!